The one for me.

If you're not the one.

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Monday, August 31, 2009, 8/31/2009 11:57:00 PM

I wish i know

I'm smelly cause i haven bath.

I ran a total of 4km today!

CLAPS*

After that, had Aston & some drinks.

Tomorrow back to working.

So long never work weekdays le.

Wed & thurs OFF.

I wana go explore new places.

But where leh?

Tell me what is true and what is not.

Don't make me confused.

Tell me what is meant to be and what is not?

I WANA SING SING & SING.

NIGHTS~

8/31/2009 02:06:00 AM

Ugliness

Do eu believe that when eu are moody or in a foul mood, eating chocolates or chocolate ice-cream can make eu feel sort of better?
Well, i do believe.
And later i'll be getting a big box of chocolate ice-cream and eat.

I watched Final Destination and The Proposal.
FD sucks whereas The Proposal is nice.
Later i'm gg sch for tennis & maybe gym.
Hasn't been exercising for a very very long time.
It's time for me to start doing that.

hmm, work?
It sucks.
SM sucks.
Messy & only more messier.
He talks alot.
He got 2 faces.
He scold ASM for everything he does when he is already trying his very best to do every single thing.
I think there's a really serious mental problem in him.
But we can't do or say anything.

I'm seriously confused.
I don't want.
But i don't know how to say no.
I'm soft-hearted & seriously i'm.
Everyone like to be, be loved really.
Everybody like sweet talks really.
If eu can leave your gf over someone else,
what does that shows?

Saturday, August 29, 2009, 8/29/2009 12:57:00 AM

Just a normal life

Can my life just be like any other normal teenagers?

With normal caring parents,
With a bunch of normal girlfriends slacking around gossiping about bgr or fashion stuffs.
Or bunch of normal cool steady friends?
A normal exciting interesting life,
a normal fun working environment.
Normal working cool friends.
Normal stress.

Normal someone who loves me so much for who i'm & i love him too.
Out dating on a normal Saturday night with that normal someone,
& a normal me.

Spelled as N.O.R.M.A.L.
But these six words are as high up as the sky, which i can never reach.
Some things cannot be changed.
I have no choice but to accept.
All i can do is to look at others with envious-ness.

Friday, August 28, 2009, 8/28/2009 12:13:00 AM

People

Had supper with Wilson and Alex just now.
I ate duck rice.
Eeee.

Basically, i did really nothing much today.
Slacking with my laptop and people.

Upon reaching woodlands interchange,
i went into the guardian.
I was stoning at that medical thingy section.
Wondering if i should get eu something for ur bruises.
But i left the place with nothing on my hand.
I really cannot forget the last msg eu sent me.
It reminds me everytime when i wanted to do something.
That's why i always told him,
I don't believe eu aren't happy with ur life now.

Tml i'm going bugis with that someone.
And it's freaking early.
Reach there by 2pm -.=
I want ben & jerry's ice-cream!
Chocolate flavour~ Chocolate flavour~

There's so much so much i wana say.
But i cannot say.
1) People might not want to hear eu vent ur frustrations nor show ur emotions to them.
2) They won't understand cos they are not eu.
3) It might hurt people.
HAIS~

Maybe i should get another job?
Or give my schedule like Mon-Sun, from morning to night?
Work non-stop & non-stop.
Availability, isn't this what eu all want?

BYE~

Thursday, August 27, 2009, 8/27/2009 02:04:00 AM

Humanity

Finally i finished my IAP, FYP & REPORTS.
Offically on holidays now.
These 2 days don't know what to do.
I can't stay alone for long cos i'll get really emo. HAIS.

Just now when to cityhall to eat with lee min.
I had pork rice with veg & ice milo at Picks & bites.
Not feeling full, we went over to HK cafe.
She had a mango pudding while i had a plate of noodle with luncheon meat & egg & a ice lychee tea.
After that, we headed to bugis to shop.
I got a small bag.
It's really small, i can't put all my stuffs inside. =(
Lee min is craving for ice-cream.
So, we had this,

It's NICE lo~
We walk around bugis, everywhere.
Nothing much.
So we eat again.

Ritz Apple Strudel & Ice Lemon Tea.

Been eating alot recently.
I should STOP eating so much.

Why people won't treat eu the way eu treat them.
Treating people good doesn't mean that they will do so in return?

Please take care of yourself.

Monday, August 24, 2009, 8/24/2009 11:40:00 PM

Full day

Forever eating my dinner at this hour.
hmm..ytd was Taha's last day.
He treated me and impian to IB.
I had penne mama mia.
I LOVES SPICY WINGS TO THE CORE!
It's yummy.
Sad to see him go. =(
Impian ride me back home.
Seriously, she is nice.

Today, Mon.
Reach sch at about 12.
Had lunch with wilson.
After that, up to the lab to do my report.
The sup left early.
So i went off early as well.

Went to cityhall with someone.
He went for his interview.
After that,
We had tomato linguine, chicken & mushroom baked rice & a regular pizza at the pizza place.
And never will i go back there again.
That someone then treated me to ben & jerry's ice-cream.
Nice nice.
We headed to tcc.
We ordered azuki freeze, hazelnutella milkshake and devil-misu.
It was damn full lo.

Wanted to check out for bags but there's nth there.
So we chat and chat.
That someone is nice.
But remember don't be sad.
Everybody have their own problems.

That someone says don't mention his name here.
FINE.

WORK, EARN, EAT & PLAY.

Sunday, August 23, 2009, 8/23/2009 02:55:00 AM

People come and go

Receive a bad news ytd.
My asm is gona transfer to PP.
Today is his last day.
I cried.
Not because i've some kind of affection towards him.
Is because he is nice, be it as a ASM or as a friend.
It's a pity that i can't be working under him anymore.

We used to go out as a group together.
He encourages people.
He bother to plan for my birthday celebration.
He gave me advises.
He will listen to what we have to say.
Have been working with him for almost a year.
And no matter how Ivan nags at him because we, part timers staff aren't doing our job well, he also won't reprimand us.
But we know he can achieve even more when he is in PP.
So we should be happy for him.

Just now Taha treated me and shammeer to the newly opened coffee club.
Service sucks + food not nice + drinks not serve.
If compared, i think IS is much much more better than them.
But Ivan is still not happy.
Why?
I seriously pity that guy that's kena picked by Ivan to work under him.
Good people always kena bullied.
@#$%^&*!

Everyone seem to be leaving and that's sad.
People come and go.
This is life.

He is the best ASM ever, MR TAHA.

Saturday, August 22, 2009, 8/22/2009 01:42:00 AM

Last friday

Munching my dinner now.
Am feeling so so hungry.

Been playing pool recently with my fyp mates during breaks.
During the afternoon,
they decided to go to grassroot for pool so i tag along.
But i forgotten slippers are not allowed.
The security guards dont allow me to go in. MEAN*
After some discussions, they decided to go to amk's pool instead.
It's raining cats and dogs.
I feel bad.
But they are nice huh, never ps me.
=)

Just back from bowling and pool not long ago with Marvin, Victor, Anderson, Mao He & Xiaofu.
I miss my fyp mates. lols

So tired now.
Nights.

Thursday, August 20, 2009, 8/20/2009 11:37:00 AM

Finally

It's finally over!
Left report now.
This time, that bloody wong seems more 'kind'.
Maybe he scare i cry again huh but i didn't.
At least he said it's better than last time.

Yesterday no mood to update my blog.
Well,
I and my fyp mates went to play 2 hrs of pool ytd.
Marvin, Steven, Victor, Mao He, QX, LT,CS, YB & me.
HOHO, FUN.

I receive a msg ytd night.
An unknown number.
It says good luck for your presentation tml.
I asked who is it.
He replyed:' Someone :) dont cry if eu are being penalise by your lecturer. It's normal.'
Thanks for those who wish me~

Tomorrow is the last day of fyp le.
=(
Why that face? I don't know.
Holidays are coming, coming, coming.

How do eu define friends?
I'm looking forward to the chalet now.

I won't let something that i don't want it to happen to happen.
Feelings can be hard to control sometimes.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009, 8/18/2009 05:13:00 PM

I'm falling

No stars.
No moon.
All i can see now is lights, fans, signboard & people.
Presentation is tml 11am! =X
I'm scare & scare & scare.
I'm sleepy.

I'm falling..
I'm falling..
When i know i shouldn't.

8/18/2009 05:13:00 PM

What got into me

Don't know what happen nowadays.
I have a serious fcuking attitude problem.
What causes me to become like that?

Today is tues, the last week of fyp.
Suddenly don't want everything to end so fast.
Cos i just started to joke and chat around with most of my lab mates, starting to get along well only.
I'm still scared of my thursday presentation.
But i'm not crying no matter how that bloody wong shoot me.

I'm now too hungry to think of anything to write here le.
I don't have the courage to ask him about eu.
I just hope eu are fine.
Although we are all living in the same planet, but why do i feel like some people and me are just worlds apart?

Money cures, this is what i see.

Sunday, August 16, 2009, 8/16/2009 11:50:00 PM

Letter D

So many many things that i want to say.
And blog will be the only place i can let most of the thing out.
Firstly,
Ytd went to watch midnight Orphan with TB.
Another free movie. THANKS.
The show is really not bad.

Today is Sunday.
Been working longer hrs nowadays + Fyp report and presentation are making me headache.
I'm really too too tired to bother about all those unhappy things.
I just want some peace.
I just want to get away from all these.

I saw smth just now.
I don't know if eu are exaggerating or i'm over reacting.
I did get alittle bit sad at that moment.
But not now.
If eu don't like me,
You can jolly well don't talk to me.
And not writting all those sarcastic stuffs.
I don't blame eu.
Before eu comment on others, do some reflecting on urself.
My attitude sucks i know. All my fault i know.
I won't do anything already.
-
-
This happen just now somewhere out there.
I don't like eu when i first saw eu.
Just now eu asked me why am i so cold.
I don't get what eu mean at that point of time and i reply,
" I'm not feeling cold, i'm feeling hot."
Now i do get what eu mean.
I can just say,
i don't want history to repeat itself.
But now, i'm thinking of eu.
I don't mean anything.
I just feel comfortable talking to eu.
And i know even if all my friends and surroundings are making me feeling stressful,
eu won't make me feel that way.

Right now, i just wana finish everything for my fyp cos it's already the last week le.
I will reflect on myself definitely.

True friends will stay.
And thanks for all ur comments.

Saturday, August 15, 2009, 8/15/2009 01:03:00 AM

Why?

HELLO @.@
The movie was okok lar.
It's funny but to me it's just a normal tv drama.
THANKS Thomas huh.
And JJ, for mon treat too.
HOHO.

Been thinking about the things that are going on in my surrounding.
I don't know why, i just feel the gap.
I like to make friends, esp friends that can get along well with me, that makes me feel comfortable talking to them.
But, seems hard huh.
My friend says i gave people an impression that i'm unfriendly.
Am i difficult to get along huh?
I want an answer. ='(

Don't make me feel that eu are looking down on people.
Don't make me feel that eu are being proud.
You have no right to say me.
I've no rights either.
Don't always think that money is important,
And that everyone is materialistic.

It's 15th.
HAIS.

Friday, August 14, 2009, 8/14/2009 09:26:00 AM

If only

It's about 930am. YAWNS*
& i'm hungry.
Ytd Xiao Bai treated me to salmon pepper lunch.
It was nice.
THANKS okies. ^^
After that, L4D.
He is dumb, save ppl save until commit suicide himself.
Later after school, i'm watching this,

It's a lame show i think.

But my friend say who cares it's lame as long as it's funny. haha

& Thomas koh is treating me to the movie.

Being a girl is good huh, got people treat. NAH~

Fyp is boring boring boring.

Facebook, msn, blog.

I don't have the sense of urgency yet. Oh my~

Everything is boring.

When i have done certain things for quite sometime & once i stop doing it,

i feel weird.

There are a few times that i want to take back my words.

SIGH~

I'm OKIE!

Eat McDonalds?

Thursday, August 13, 2009, 8/13/2009 04:33:00 PM

If i can be given another choice

6 more schooling days and i will have 2 months of holiday.
Holiday is good but abit sian also.
And cannot meet up with friends that often like we do in school.

By right, i should start doing my report or even earlier before.
I ask my supervisor and this is what he says,
" Don't worry about your report la." =.=ll
I don't know is he gone case or we gone case.
I think he is fed up with the 3 of us cos we used 12 weeks to design the wheels.
PHEW~ SIGH~
I got a feeling he's going to extend us nia. T_T

Anyway, i went to look for my DEAR assessors just now.
Esther was not around so i had no choice but to find that bloody wong first.
He don't remember me and i was relieved.
He seems to be like 2 different person when he is assessing me and when i'm talking to him just now.
He make me feel scared to present seriously.

Date: Thursday, 20th August 2009

Time: 11am

Title: Final Year Project

Research and Development of a non-magnetic wall climbing robot.

I regretted for not doing my fyp seriously.
I regretted for not putting enough effort in everything that i do.
Really.
I take things for granted.
I treat people badly.
This is me.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009, 8/12/2009 11:52:00 PM

Don't judge a book by its cover.

Boo!
One of my ear hole kena infection.
And it hurts like hell.

Dinner with Vanessa just now.
It has been a long time since i last saw her.
She is sweet and photogenic.
Damn blog cannot upload photos.

I received a letter when i reach home.
I was surprised.
Inside the envelope was a 1 1/2 page letter,
a photo,
and a accessory with my name on it.
I was touched, really touched.

Last paragraph, it says,
" Many things eu can only think back but there won't be any chance to go back to the past. After thinking back, don't commit the same mistake again that eu made. Treat them better. There are better choices waiting for eu. Don't forget those time we spent! Cause i will remember. =)
I don't want to see LY doing so much for anyone who don't worth it. I want to see the old LY again. The LY whom just joined tcc. " =')

Maybe some people eu don't get to contact always.
Maybe some people might seem that they don't care.
But,
Never judge a book by its cover.
A simple letter, or just a small effort made shows everything.
Thanks alot.
I really appreciate it.

LOVE or MONEY?
My feelings won't be based on money definitely.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009, 8/11/2009 09:46:00 AM

This is not what i want

HOHO.
My mum says she will sponsor me half of my gucci wallet.
Hmm, at least better than nth huh.
She say after i get my car license, they will get me a small car.
But, why is it a SMALL car ? =X

I HATE doing hosting on busy days.
Ivan sucks.
He will go on & on & on + he've got an irritating face. Argh*
One thing, Daniel looks like Edison. Cool~ HAHA.
-
-

-I did tried-

I hate the scent of your perfume in other guy's body.

I did tried, i really did.

If now eu were to tell me what he told me, i will still turn back.

But i know eu won't and will never will.

The more i do, the more inferior i feel about myself.

You won't do this to me if eu still cares for me even for alittle.

Maybe you are right.

They are your friends, closest closest friends.

More important than anything else.

You have a choice meh?

I won't shed a tear when i see photos of gals beside eu anymore.

I won't shed a tear when i misses eu cos i know eu won't be here.

I won't think of eu cos i know eu are not thinking of me.

I never ever think of leaving eu over other better guys.

Anyway, it's all not important anymore.

Maybe eu sparing a thought for me.

So should i thanks eu?

All are just excuses.

I won't turn back.

I hope eu will be happy.

Monday, August 10, 2009, 8/10/2009 12:44:00 AM

Random

Impian have been giving me free rides home on her bike since ytd.
I feel bad.
THANKS SO MUCH IMPIAN! :)
Don't quit so early kies, cos i'll miss eu ='(
Work has been fine for me i guess.

Hmm, going to work hard during the holidays.
I want to get myself a gucci wallet.
No ipod first.
Wonder if my mum will sponsor.
The LV bag she gave can't put my long wallet in cos its small.
So i need to get a small gucci wallet that can only put notes inside.
=D

Working at 1230 later.
Tired nia.
I'm not having enough sleep.
My dark eye circles are like.. HAIS.

Endure for another 2 more weeks & it will be holidays + holidays.
HOHO.
I need to sleep already.
I need 10 hrs of sleep eu know.
Sometimes i feel bad,
cos i'm always lying to my parents.
What to do?
=(
I realized, i'm definitely not good at making faces.

GOOD NIGHT.

Saturday, August 8, 2009, 8/08/2009 02:12:00 AM

TIRED TIRED TIRED

Went to eat dinner at Sembawang Aston.
Kim boon and Victor treated me.
THANKS. ^_^
After that we went to watch this:

It was nice. She is pretty lo.
But i hate watching movie at cwp.
Tml, sun & monday will be working.
I seriously need to save up now.

What should i do on sat night after my work?
It sucks to go home so early on a sat night lo.
Kb told me that there's this gay and les club.
Sounds cool huh.

I miss AMK.
I'm so so tired.
My head is aching now now now.
Leave me alone.
I want a bedtime story, can i?
NIGHTS.

Friday, August 7, 2009, 8/07/2009 11:36:00 AM

This is life

Willie and i are giving suggestions on what to do during the chalet.
I'm so looking forward to holidays as i haven't had 1 since don't know how long!
And looking forward to the chalet as well.
It's fun and will be fun.
Hope so. =)

He ask me if i've changed.
Changed to a person who is hooked on drinking and clubbing.
I told him no.

Sometimes have been wondering,
If there's this guy that i like who's willing to do everything that i did to me. It'll be good lar huh.
NO!
I'm not thinking anymore.

Yesterday i watched stars for a cause.
It was a very nice and meaningful show.
About voluntary work in different parts of the world.
You can never imagine what they are going through.
If there's chance, i would wana go to different parts of the world to do voluntary work.

I hate myself for being narrow-minded.

I still do feel something.

I fully understand the feeling of doing things and not being appreciated by that person.

But what can i do?

This is life.

My friend say this pic looks like some kind of actress, which is not good. Shit him!

Thursday, August 6, 2009, 8/06/2009 02:23:00 PM

Let it go

Have been thinking alot.
I'm very very very confused.

Where are eu when i need eu?
Where are eu on my birthday?
Not even a reply.

You have ur problems i know.
Maybe eu don't want to burden me i know.
But he say there is hope, this i don't know.

For eu i have really done all that i could.
I don't go around telling people what i do.
God have eyes.
Maybe eu did get touched by alittle, i don't know.
Or maybe not at all.

But ur actions tell me everything,
That eu don't bother at all.

He say eu want me to change.
This is ur reason.
What can i say.

Standing inside the packed mrt cabin, i was thinking,
" I don't have to skip fyp just to go to amk to get him food anymore, when i'm so scared that my sup will knows."

" I don't have to think of what food to buy for him, what presents, what things that i can do or make for him during occasions anymore."

" I don't have to think of ways to help solve his problems, worrying about his leg and stuffs."

" I don't have to scare that he will scold his friend that helped me or sent a text to me asking me not to get him anything anymore."

" I should be happy."

But i don't know why tears begin to flow down my cheeks.
What is the use of hanging on when i know i already has no space in ur heart?

I broke a glass accidentally, my favourite glass.
It's a pity to throw it away.
I tried many ways, i used super super glue to stick it back.
But no use.
It cannot return to how it is used to be.
What's left is shattered glasses.
If i insist on keeping them, i will get hurt by those shattered pieces and bleed one day.
So, i can only throw it away.

I'm not blaming eu.
I don't have the right.
You deserve better.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009, 8/05/2009 02:47:00 PM

Tell me

Yeah-ness :)
My mum woke me up at 8am.
It's alrdy late so i plan to sleep awhile longer.
After that, she say there's a letter for me.
I woke up upon hearing the word "passed" from her mouth.

I PASSED MY BTT!!
Thanks for the practice that i took before my actual test.
Like finally passed after failing for 2 times.
Seeing the BIG " FAILED " from the com screen sucks huh.
It wasn't that happy unless until i get my car license.
This is only the beginning.
But at least i don't have to book for btt and read that theory book again.

My fyp is ending in 2 weeks time & i'll have 2 months holiday. WEE~
My secondary sch chalet is confirm!
14-16 sept.
Looking forward :D
Everything is ending real soon.

Maybe i do sometimes,

But even if time can be rewind back,

I will still do the same thing.

Tell me if this is really what eu want.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009, 8/04/2009 11:57:00 PM

Unanswered Qns

Why do people fall in love or like other people so easily?

Why will people get so sad and emo over such issues?

Why is it so hard to convince ourselves that giving doesn't mean receiving?

Why people tend to think that their thinking are always right?

What is the different between love and crush?

Who are my best and trusted friends?

I tried, is it rather better than i never try at all?

Is life all about pretty faces and bodies?

So what if eu are able to get me everything i want?
I won't be tempted to it.
So what if eu treated me very good and cares alot for me.
I can take care of myself.
What eu expect me to do?
Just like what i expect him to do?
That's impossible.
Don't compare.
It's just him.

I'm not emo-ing, just wondering.
Contradicting huh.

8/04/2009 02:29:00 PM

This is how it is like.

I'm freaking hungry now now now.
But i can only eat at 3pm cos their break is at 3.
Don't make any noise pls stomach.
I'll reward eu with nice food later okies.

HAIS. Getting real tired.
Still stucked in drawing the UG design for the robot wheels.
Draw, change, draw, change, draw, change again!
My whole 12 weeks of fyp will be wheels wheels & wheels.
I think i won't get a good grade alrdy.
=(

There's something that i don't understand these 2 days.
Sat, it was suppose to be a happy & fun day for me.
But i dono why some people were just pissed off with me -.-
Am i wrong?
All my friends are nice people lar huh.
Don't worry.
I trust them.
Sometimes, it just gets a little weird when people are too caring for me. LOL
Well, still thanks for all the concern yea.

This is cute: " LOVE AT OLG AGE"
--Ah pek and Ah ma in their golden years.--

Ah pek and Ah ma are lying in bed one night.

The husband was falling asleep but the wife felt romantic and wanted to talk.

She said, " You used to hold my hand when we were courting."

Wearily, he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to get back to sleep.

A few moments later she said, " Then, you used to kiss me."

Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep.

Thirty seconds later she said, " Then, you used to bite my neck."

Angrily, he threw back the bed covers, got out of bed and walk away!

" Where are you going?" she asked.

" To get my teeth lah!"

So sweet huh.
Nothing beats having eu by my side.
:)

Off to koufu~

Sunday, August 2, 2009, 8/02/2009 11:58:00 PM

MY 1ST AUGUST

I turn 20 yesterday.
It was a long day.
But i had fun.

Reach at 230pm instead of 2 at dhoby gaut.
I and my group of poly friends went to sing K at a nightclub.
JJ treated me.
I sang the most as i was holding on to the mic most of the time.
I feel bad as some people didn't get to sing alot. =X
They brought me a chocolate cake =P
It was nice but too much cream.
I was greedy, I made more than 1 wishes.
Is ok de right? HAHA.

After that dinner at cafe cartel.
Wanted to try the market place actually but the queue was long.
So decided to come back and try it next time.
I had grilled chicken & linguine. It was ok ok la huh.
JJ treated as well, consider la.
We chatted and joked around like nobody's business.

1030pm, reach cityhall.
Waited for Taha to go to zirca.
It was quite surprised la when i reach there.
This time was with my working friends and my 3 other friends.
2 shots of sex on the beach, 1 glass of sparking wine, 2 cups of vodka mixed can really made me drop dead, real dead.
I regretted.
I haven't had fun and i'm alrdy drunk in less than an hour.
It was terrible, terrible in my heart as well.

Drag until almost 3am before i met up with my sec sch friends in the pub. They said i'm freaking late.
I'm, and it's a pity cos some were about to leave alrdy.
And i never take photos with them =(
Never mind, chalet is coming.
I need to catch up with them.

I had fun not because i went club or pub.
Whether you believe it anot, i don't like clubbing.
I wana go back to last time.
I'm sad, i cried because i hate myself for not being able to be strong.

SHE IS NICE.
I HUGGED HER AND CRIED REAL HARD YTD.

LAST,

I want to thanks everyone for their presents, thanks for the treats, thanks for the drinks, thanks for all the wishes & thanks for the presence.
THANKS LOTS!

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